Improving Success in Life

Folks that are self confident know exactly how they can improve their lives and they know that improvement can lead to success, and whole life fulfillment.

There is no set definition to success but rather it is whatever you need to feel satisfied with your own situation. It is a personal judgment you make about yourself, and it does not matter if somebody else disagrees. Let them focus on their own success, and they will not be so concerned with yours.

Some folks who are not self-confident, figure that life is good enough and does not need improving. That is all so well and good until they have to face something, which they are not sure how to handle. The need for immediate change and the doubt that they will be successful can be overwhelming.

Life's little adjustments do not have to be major events. Improving your marriage does not take counseling and legal separation, or a divorce and a different partner. All it means is putting in the extra effort to keep each other happy. Those actions will be different for every couple. It could mean making coffee in the morning, or kissing each other before bed every night.

Boredom in the Work Environment

When you do the same thing, day in, day out for months on end, your subconscious may start to shake things up a bit. You know the woman at work who, after fifteen years of happy marriage, starts flirting with the new guy in the mailing room or the veteran mailman who starts to "accidentally" drop mail along his route. These folks partake in self-destructive behaviours because of sheer boredom.

Eventually they will have to face the consequences of those actions, which could easily lead to big changes in their boring lives. The sad thing is, they no longer have the option to make the changes in their own lives. They have handed that power over to somebody else, who could easily make much worse decisions.

Gerry had a great job with a medical supplies company in deliveries. Fresh out of high school, dealing mostly with the infirmed and elderly was not exactly his idea of a satisfying career. However, how could he give up a good job with benefits when his parents are so proud of him?

Gerry is in a position where, despite the good job, which his he parents believe is successful, he is not satisfied with his life. His paycheck has not given him a sense of fulfillment. If he is not careful, he may start engaging in self-destructive behaviors and lose his job and his parents' respect.

Linking Actions to Intentions

During the daily grind, it is easy to lose your sense of our focus. We often wind up making decisions that work against our goals. In the example above, Gerry’s focus on keeping his job for the sake of stability will ultimately lead to his situation falling apart.

How can we make sure our actions fall in line with our intentions? Common sense is not the answer. It makes perfect sense that keeping your job will create a stable environment. Sometimes we have to look at how we feel.

• Is what you are doing making you feel good about yourself?
• Do your actions fulfill you in the here and now?

There will never be a time when we are 100% satisfied with life, but sometimes an opportunity just does not feel right.

Joanne’s husband left her after the birth of their second child and she desperately needs a job. She spots an ad in the paper for exotic dancers. The work hours are good for her, as her mom will watch the kids overnight, and the pay is excellent. Although financially it would be a good break, she decides not to go for it, because for her, the job just was not a match with her personality.

It is very easy to be caught up in responsibilities and expectations and forget that, as a human, you are limited to a degree by your emotions. If you feel unfulfilled, or hate what you do, you will never make an effort to improve and you will never feel successful.

Self-confidence takes the ability to see what you need to change in order to feel better about your life, and the effort and commitment to make those plans mature.